We're all Zoombies Now: Hellfire and ZoomNation

Not having to go out sure saves a lot of time. This morning even though I have to work for a few hours, I feel unrushed and able to relax and enjoy. I made berry-chocolate chip muffins. I hung out with Dennis and the girls on the stairs this morning, having a group hug. It was so refreshing to be able to stop and enjoy the moment.

I hope that's what other people are discovering in this break from our insane pace of life in this country. And I also hope people are realizing that when the virus threat is minimized and we are all allowed to start easing back into our normal lives, that we intentionally try to make our new post-pandemic world much less stressful and chaotic.

I started my new job orientation this past week and that was a great distraction from everything else I've been focused on for the past several weeks since we all started staying at home. I'm a bit mentally overloaded with the learning curve but it's actually not bad. I look forward to resuming work next week and starting to get into a routine.

Since all of my work is remote and using Zoom, and my social life has also been on Zoom, and prior to this, my business work was on Zoom, I'm turning into a Zoom-bie. Or a Zoom-bot? Not sure what to call it. We live, work and play on Zoom now.

Before I started my job this week, I was focused on all the bad things about our world, and angry about all that's going wrong. I care a lot about healthcare and I am still beside myself with the way healthcare workers have been treated and neglected in this crisis, but that's a whole other blogpost, or even a whole other blog. I will deal with that later, I am hoping to be able to collaborate with grassroots nursing leaders and start planning and organizing a response to this. I think ZDogg summed it up very well in his recent video, which I'll link here. 

Here is another link to one of the better articles I've read during this debacle.

After reading this short article above, and watching this 8 minute video, let's all take a moment to step back and contemplate why what is happening now is just an outgrowth of a flawed and broken system. This is what I've been bitching about here since the beginning of this blog, but especially since around 2012. Now it's to the point of being done out in the open, shamelessly. They don't even try to cover their tracks, healthcare leaders have been getting away with this bullshit for so long, they think it's business as usual.

And healthcare workers bear some of the blame. They (we) deserve it, the people who won't speak up, who won't have each others' backs in the workplace, who say nothing when they see something wrong, dangerous, or unethical, who run away with their tails between their legs, afraid they will lose their jobs. Their precious jobs, that undercompensate them, exhaust them, make them sick and fat and old before their time, abuse them, allow them to be sheep for their fat cat masters? Now do you see why I've been saying this?

1. NO JOB IS WORTH YOUR LIFE.

2. NO JOB IS WORTH YOUR PHYSICAL OR MENTAL HEALTH.

3. NO JOB IS WORTH GIVING AWAY YOUR HUMAN RIGHTS.

4. NO JOB IS WORTH RISKING YOUR FAMILY'S HEALTH AND LIVES.

5. NO JOB IS WORTH GIVING UP YOUR DIGNITY OR YOUR VALUES.

Yes, I am yelling. Anything that is happening, regardless of the CDC changes, regardless of what you've been told is the new policy, that goes against what you know to be right and safe and scientifically sound, go home and write it down. Document everything. Because when this is done, we need to hold these people to account. I hope to see massive resignations and firings of high level healthcare executives and top "leadership".

We need to burn our healthcare system down. TO THE GROUND. People who use fear of socialism and socialized medicine as an excuse for not changing, if you're so opposed to that, then don't cash your relief checks from the government. Because that is called a social safety net.

If you take advantage of free testing or waived copays for any medical attention as a result of COVID 19, you're using government healthcare-because that is called socialized medicine.

OMG! Socialism! The horrors! That people would actually be protected from being kicked out of their homes, utilities being shut off, starving in the streets. If a safety net horrifies you, go hang out in a megachurch and pray with thousands of other idiots somewhere down south. Do us all a favor. We could greatly improve our national gene pool that way.

Okay, I'll stop now because I said this was for a whole other blogpost.

Right now I am so glad to see people out breathing fresh air and moving, walking, as long as they are social distancing. It's exactly what everybody needed. Time to slow down, take a time out from our insane pace of life in this country, our addiction to consumer goods and services, and just be the human beings that we are.

Let's not go back to normal. Ever.

In Like a Lion...

What a week!

Starting with the dog bite incident last Saturday, the week unfolded into further bits of unwanted disruption. But we're still here, feet on the ground, AND breathing. Deep breaths.

Sunday the dog catcher (animal control) came over to take a statement from me. I felt like I couldn't really let go of the incident until I got a chance to say what happened. The animal control officer was really nice and helpful. The rabies was expired so the dog went to be quarantined at the pound. They cited Honey Boo Boo for 4 violations, so she'll be paying through the nose and I will also be sending her my medical bills.

Turns out the dog's rabies vaccine expired last August, so I wasn't too worried about rabies...dog would still have antibodies. At least I got out of that.

Then it was back to work. Other than having to get my butt dressing changed twice a day and the tape breaking down my skin, making it more painful every time, I was doing okay.

The Wheels Come Off

Wednesday night Dennis's ball joint broke on his left front axle, the wheel came off just as he was turning onto a side street in our neighborhood. Lucky he was going about 5 mph when it happened. I wasn't even awake- I was sleeping because I had to wake up at 4 to drive to Denver in the morning with my student for SoPE- Society of Physician Entrepreneurs meeting.

Dennis took the day off on Thursday, got the car towed to Toyota, and rented a car. I always remind myself money does grow on trees, though. It is a renewable resource. And we haven't gotten an estimate yet...

Early in the week the gauze and tape dressing got to the point where it hurt worse than the bite, so we switched to waterproof tegaderm-like patches. By Thursday I graduated to little bandaids. I couldn't do my abdominal exercises that required sitting on my butt. I didn't run all week.

By the weekend I was ready to run again. Saturday I ran Coyote Ridge with a friend and did well on the trails. That was 7 1/2 miles and felt so refreshing. This morning I ran 6 miles on the roads and did some faster strides. And...I stood on the scale and I'm down to 132 after 3 weeks of cutting back on beer, and watching what I eat. Only 12 pounds to go.

By the end of this week I should have a pretty good idea of when I can launch Cancer Harbors, my online service. I met a journalist at the SoPE meeting and will be able to get a company pitch in his publication. I'm plugging away at the last minute details.

This week is looking a bit crazy at the beginning, but Thursday is my birthday and I plan to do something for myself that day. Not sure what. You only turn 52 once.

I really wanted to go off on a rant in this blogpost but I'll save it for later. Something about irresponsible people who have no sense of connection or responsibility to other people. Yes it has to do with irresponsible dog owners, like the girl I saw today with the pit bull. The dog was wearing a leash, yes, but it was not connected to its owner. I probably wouldn't have even noticed except that I am hyperaware since the bite. But also about people with irresponsible attitudes about guns and people who attend Donald Trump rallies. I don't have the energy tonight. But I wish these Darwin award contenders would hurry up and get it over with before they pollute the gene pool any further.

That's all I've got left tonight. Later...

Friday Clearance!

What a week!

I am finding myself in need of a breather today after a little unexpected bonus running adventure yesterday!

First, what's up with the sign? Mental clearance sale? That idea came from my new friend, fellow blogger and passionate patient advocate Terri, at Diep C Journey. For those of my readers who also have an interest in breast cancer-related matters, Terri is a powerful and influential advocate for women who need education and resources for reconstruction options following a mastectomy. Since this blog is not about breast cancer I have given you her URL so you can check out and follow her blog.

I need a mental clearance sale today myself, simply because my brain has been on overload all week and things finally caught up with me yesterday.

Last week I was a slug. I just could not find the motivation again. I got an amazing amount of work done, so that was fine. Finding the consistency to keep moving is the struggle these days.

Monday I started out with a busy week but committing to myself to get back into the habit of doing about 10 miles a day on my feet. Not that hard to do if I run for an hour, walk the girls once or twice, and add a little extra walking somewhere during the day.

I got a fair amount done early in the week and had some extra preparation to do, I had a few client appointments, plus I am having a promotional video made for my business and part of the footage includes the exercise class I teach, so I needed to get things in order for that. Also, I had a tweet chat last night and needed to prepare for it.

To top it off we are finding ourselves in need of an extra person on the return crew for Bob's double Badwater adventure. Trying to find someone who is free to drop everything and leave for Death Valley, is fit enough and heat-prepared enough, and can be flexible about dates as we don't know how long it will take, and, most important of all, will be drama-free and have their head screwed on straight even when severely sleep deprived, is a major challenge. If we can't find that person, we will somehow make it work. But it sure would be nice to have the extra body.

I managed to do okay with the mileage on my feet for the first half of the week. I only made 10 miles one day but came close on the others. That didn't matter so much as getting a good quality workout with some vertical at some point this week. I have to fit those in when the time allows, and the only opening I had was Thursday. I figured I could get up early, drive up to Estes and do a couple of summits of Twin Sisters to get a good 14 miles and close to 5000 feet of vertical in, then get back to town in time to maybe even take a nap before the client appointment and the tweetchat.

As it turned out, I didn't need to set my alarm or the coffeepot for 3:30 am, because my body woke me up at precisely 12:57 am after going to bed at 10:30. I stayed in bed until 2 am, not falling back asleep, so I finally said #$@% it and I'm getting up, I'll just bring my headlamp. I left the house at 3 am with some PBJs, lots of drinks, and warm clothes.

I felt like crap of course, on 2 1/2 hours of sleep, but I was alert, and I arrived at the trailhead around 4:15 am. I haven't hiked Twin Sisters since before the 2013 flood which cut a huge slide in the side of the mountain and wiped out parts of the trail, so I didn't know how different it would be. Actually not that different, there's just some straight up vertical climbing for short little sections where the switchbacks used to be.

I headed up the trail, tripping over a rock but catching myself within the first 100 feet. Hmm. I guess being that sleep deprived doesn't raise any red flags.

I kept going, and when I got to the slide at about 1.25 miles, I had to take my time trying to see where the trail had been diverted, in the dark, looking for cairns which had been placed. It was hard to see and it took a long time to figure out where I needed to go. I was hoping to summit by sunrise, but as it turned out I was about a mile below the summit when the sun came up, in the bristlecone & lodgepole transition forest, which made for some awesome photos.

It took me nearly 2 hours to get to the summit. I did fine once I was able to turn the headlamp off. In the old days I was able to get to the top and back down, do the whole thing, in about an hour and 40 minutes. I can remember one year I did a triple in 6 hours. That's how fit I used to be. Not anymore!

I got up to the summit, sat on top of the west peak for a few minutes in the wind, took some pictures, sent Dennis a text, and then headed back down. Once you start to cross the rocky section above treeline, just before you head back into the trees, I was walking down the trail, and...

I was face down, looking at rocks and some little alpine wildflowers, my wrists hurt like hell, my knees were throbbing, and my right calf muscles were cramped in an almost square shape. Knocked the breath right out of me. I was gasping more from the pain of the calf cramp than anything. No one was around. It was 6:30 am, I was at 11,000 feet, lying prone on the trail, and once the calf cramp let up, I slowly had the sense to assess myself to see if I could get up and move. My left wrist was the worst, but my right shin hurt like hell too.

Did I break anything? I moved my wrist and thumb around, which were inside my glove. Fortunately I was bundled up in the cold wind from the summit, so when I peeled my glove back, only the heel of my left hand had skin scraped off and was slightly bleeding. My wrist and thumb were working fine. My right hand was rashed under the glove but the skin was intact, and no problems there except pain from the impact. I moved my right leg carefully so as not to trigger another cramp. I was scraped and a big knot was coming up on my lower shin, and my left knee hurt, but no blood.

I slowly got into a sitting position, lightheaded and feeling nauseated, I sat there for a second, waiting for it to either pass, to puke, or for me to pass out again without having to fall too far. Fortunately none of those things happened. I was shaking all over though. After a few minutes I began to get up slowly, hoping walking was possible. I was upright and began walking very slowly down the trail.

I felt a little lightheaded, probably from the altitude. I drank some water. Everything seemed to be intact, but I knew I wasn't coming back up for another summit. I was headed back to the car, and I figured I might even have to take a nap in it before trying to drive home.

Once I got down the trail and down in altitude a little, I felt a lot better, and made much better time, but I had to be extra careful not to catch my toe on any rocks. I haven't been doing my hip exercises, which were the thing that got me back to trail running in the first place. I am sure my hip flexors are weak and I was dragging my feet, plus being so tired. And of course, my tendency to G Bird out when I'm up high. 11,000 feet is a new low altitude record for turning into Gooney Bird, though. I obviously need to get up to the mountains more!

By the time I got back to the car I was awake and decided just to go home. I did a mental check every few miles to make sure I was still awake. Wasn't a problem. I arrived home and made breakfast, let Dennis know I was home and headed off to bed for a long nap.

I had to get up and get dressed to see a client, then get back in time to eat and prepare for the Tweet chat. I still owed the sleep bank a good 3 hours. I needed to get through until 8 pm and then I could crash. And I did, after some dinner, ibuprofen and a beer. Even Dennis took pity on me and got me some chocolate. Because I fell down.

The Tweet chat went well despite some issues with Twitter loading slowly, so I am hoping I'll get to do more of those in the future.

Today I have a huge knot and small scrape on my lower right shin, a small knot on my outer left knee, a very sore left wrist and somewhat less so right wrist, my triceps and shoulders and forearms all feel like I did an Olympic powerlifting competition and won a gold medal.

I don't know what I was thinking, really, I guess I underestimate my ability to do dumb things while running. I might have lost some fitness, but not that special gift with which so many ultrarunners are endowed. I am not in the kind of shape that I have been in the past, this is my first time at altitude all year, and on 2 1/2 hours of sleep, hiking up a slightly unfamiliar trail in the dark by headlamp, by myself, was almost Darwin Award-esque.

The one thing I can say is that besides being very lucky, I think I just saved my insurance company some bucks on a DEXA scan. If I went down that hard and didn't break anything, I must have some pretty dense bones. That slammed my distal radius. I am really sore today, all the way up my arms, shoulders and back. That was some impact especially on my left wrist. I can see the bruise on my palm.

You're very welcome, Anthem Blue Cross & Blue Shield.

So, the plan is, chill out today, no intense brain, physical or other work. This weekend hopefully I can get a few miles in, but whatever. I have a week and a half until I leave for Death Valley. Hopefully we find an extra crew member.

And before I forget, beer plug of the month: Odell has outdone itself here. It's called Brombeere, it's a Blackberry Gose. Whatever that is. I am not generally a fan of sour beers, I have not been that impressed with many of the sour beers out there but this one I love. They balanced the flavors just right. A new favorite!

On Badassery...

What is Badassery?

Funny how the "Bad Ass" phrase gets tossed around by ultrarunner types. I've been seeing it a lot lately. Cat sent me a message to tell me she couldn't make my talk last night, she had a boot camp workout with her daughter and said "maybe it will make me as badass as you". Ha. She has a pretty bad ass herself, she doesn't need a boot camp class but she's doing it to be with her daughter.

Spoke at Runners' Roost last night and there was a good turnout despite the heavy downpour that happened just before 6 pm, but by the time we all left the store to go for the group run before my talk, the rain stopped. I showed my Badwater Double Slideshow, something I had to dust off. It's been 3 years since I ran it, and about a year since I last showed it to anyone. There were a lot of questions about Badwater, and I forgot how much interest that generates. I had planned to talk more specifically about ultras and preparing for them, but I let the questions guide the discussion instead. It worked out well.

I did want to talk more last night about the notion of Badassing it...people get so caught up in the achievement, the numbers, statistics, that they forget about the essence of the experience, and that is what I always want to convey. I ran across Death Valley to be a tiny dot in a landscape full of colorful rocks and stars. I wanted to be in that place, and traveling through it on foot, in those conditions, which make it that much more intense and enjoyable.

And really, it's not at all about being a bad ass.

Getting distracted by shiny objects like trophies, awards, and records takes the focus away from the real inner strength you develop as you push yourself past the limits you thought you possessed. I see it a lot, especially in young male ultrarunners, though women are also prone to this. The idolatry thing, getting all caught up in the eye-popping amazement at someone else's achievements, usually defined by some small number of hours and minutes it took the object of your mesmerization to finish a given course relative to your own finish, or by a large number of miles, vertical feet, or other statistic. Worshipping that person like they are some kind of superhuman, or a god, or some sort of divine being that you would kiss their feet should they even speak to you.

But just because someone possesses these characteristics or talents of speed, endurance, intelligence, determination, stubbornness, or luck doesn't mean their formula or anything they do will work for you. That includes shoes, gear, training plans, food, rituals, home life, you name it. Getting over the idolatry thing means you stop comparing yourself to others. Yes the people you worship are made of something different, AND YOU'RE MADE OF SOMETHING DIFFERENT TOO, that's up to you to discover on your own and it will be different from ANYONE else, that's a sure thing. But idolatry will only take the focus off of what you need to do to be your own best self.

Ultrarunners go through stages of self-discovery in which they develop and encourage badassery amongst themselves. It's like a rite of passage, testing your physical limits, and your mental limits. It's important to go through these phases because this is where you learn so much about yourself, and your potential. It's incredibly powerful and empowering. It delivers you from the idolatry phase to the self-actualization phase, where you are comfortable in your own skin and confident in what you can accomplish. This is where you become your own athlete. You pursue what appeals to you, and that is where you shine.

Someone asked me last night what I learned about myself in doing the ultras I have done, and I replied that I learned that if I set my mind to something that I decide to do, I can do anything. And the other side of that coin is that you can't fly by the seat of your pants, it takes a lot of learning, research, studying, and planning to do an endurance event.

Unfortunately along the way many new runners discover the number one rule of badassery: Stupidity always trumps badassery. So if you don't learn the lessons from the school of hard knocks, you will never make it, and might end up winning a Darwin Award along the way.

Or if you're like the Canadian guy who placed third at Hardrock this year, who got struck by lightning, shattering his headlamp on top of Handies Peak, you're just lucky enough to avoid the Darwin Award. Definitely deserves a nomination. That's not bad ass, that's stupid. The fact that he placed third doesn't make it okay. I'm glad he finished safely. But I also hope he realizes just how close he was to being dead.

My friend Kirk just finished his 20th Hardrock. That's considered badass. And Lisa Smith-Batchen just finished a quadruple crossing of Badwater. That's also considered badass. It's also something I would loved to have done, but financially I can't do it unless I made some pretty extreme sacrifices, which I'm unwilling to do. I know if wanted it bad enough, I would do it, but I guess I don't. I am happy with my road double. I'd love to just stay out there all summer and run as many roads in the park as I could and try to see everything.

But none of us who have become our own athletes do these things to be badass. That is the last thing on our minds. It's an inner effort, an inner challenge, but it contains so much positive energy and it's the essence of living, doing what you love the most. If that's badass, then I guess we're all guilty, all of us ultrarunners.

So in that sense, there's not nearly enough badassery going on. More people should find their inner badass. Finding what drives them, what they love the most, and pursuing it with their full dedication, passion, and energy.

Holidays Bring Out the Darwin Award Candidates...

Nothing like a holiday weekend to bring out the Darwin Award candidates.

Today was my shorter run day, it was hot and I slept in late. I slept until 9:00, I don't remember the last time I did that. I guess I was catching up on lost sleep from the 4th. It was 91 degrees when I started at 11 and 95 when I finished after 1 pm. It felt hot today, I packed ice around my neck the whole time and still I was hot.

There's a tularemia outbreak and the Parks & Rec department posted signs all over the lower Power Trail warning people to keep their pets on the path, on the leash, away from dead animals, and out of ditches and other water holes that might be contaminated.

I was running south along the Power Trail and there's this one bridge near the golf course that has a ditch below it. There's water in it, and it's gated off to keep people out. There were signs posted today about tularemia everywhere. Including on the gate next to the bridge.

There was this guy with a dog, the dog was off leash, soaking wet and shaking off the water on the trail as I approached. There was a woman riding her bike northbound and I heard her say to the guy, "Did you see the signs about tularemia?" I didn't stick around to hear the end of that conversation. I'm sure he saw the signs. He's an idiot, on two counts: for exposing his dog to tularemia, and for having the dog out there when it's 95 degrees.

Things were quieter last night but there were still some people shooting off leftover fireworks on nearby streets. I woke up hot flashing and was awake for a couple of hours, but went back to sleep.

Tomorrow it's back to reality. Long holiday week and weekend are over, gotta get back on track and keep the momentum going. And it will be my rest week from running. I'll get on the bike and give my legs a break, and give the hip flexor a chance to heal. This month is going to fly by, I can tell already.

We did have fun for Isabelle's birthday. The apple carrot peanut butter pupcakes were a hit with the girls, and Iris sang happy birthday to her sister.

Redneck Holiday

It's Isabelle's birthday and I doubled her age in miles. Poor Isabelle. She has to share her birthday on the day after the worst holiday that exists, as far as she's concerned. She shakes in terror the whole night before, every year, thanks to the almost universal (in this country) whims of dumbass redneck hicks who use what little intelligence they have to blow firecrackers out their asses on the day of July 4th and for several days before and after.

Have I told you how much I hate fireworks? I don't mind organized fireworks displays that are put on at public parks for large crowds of people. But the stray ones in town, and for the stupid people who set them off in fire-prone areas, I'm gonna kick your ass, mothafuckas!

Yes I'm labeling people today, because I am sick and tired of these ignorant selfish yahoos who have no concern that their behavior is inhumane to creatures who share the earth with them. Darwin Award candidates. I always hope they blow their fucking hands off. It pisses me off that I have to give my dogs sedatives for them to get through the night on July 4th.

I did a little over 26 miles today, super easy in 4:45, started at 10 am and finished around 3 pm. It was 75 degrees when I started and 93 when I finished. I ran a consistent pace throughout and felt good, especially in the heat. I did four 6+mile out & backs running around Warren Lake. I used the house as an aid station so I didn't carry too much, but I did fill my ice bandana and wrapped it around my neck the last two times.

I took the last two days off, my right hip flexors are not happy after my 30 miler at Horsetooth a week ago. I remember now that it was within the first mile as I started running downhill, before I was really warmed up, I felt a sharp sudden pain in one spot on the front of my right hip, but it went away after a few steps and didn't bother me the rest of the run. I was probably tight and strained the muscle there. I didn't feel it again until the next day, and it's just been an annoyance all week.

I iced and took a couple of days off, and everything felt fine today in the first 20 miles, by the end I could feel the sore spot again, and I iced when I got home. It was fine when I was running, it hurts when I put pressure on the spot with my hand. I had planned to run the Firecracker 5K on the 4th of July but slept in until 8 am, which was a better option. Speed and hills are what will aggravate this, so I'll take the opportunity to rest up for a while.

I think it needs a bit more time and more stretching and ice once things settle down. Next week will be an easy week for me, I might just stay on the bike since it's my low mileage week anyway. Then I have a week before I leave for Badwater. The time at Badwater usually doesn't involve much running at all when you're on medical. I will time it with my running schedule as a break.

I am so looking forward to this trip. I don't know if it's just the thought of being alone and isolated in my car from here to Las Vegas and having the time to think, or not think, or the memory of the dry hot wind baking me as I keep the AC off and the windows down, or what.

I had to go to Target the other day for a few things and I was having Las Vegas flashbacks while I was in there. I think it's because the only time I go to those stores is when I'm getting ready for a race, and it was hot, and there's this cheap plastic smell in those stores that also remind me of Las Vegas. All I know is that I'm looking forward to it. I also look forward to the grounding feeling again of being with my peeps...

There's also the visit to Sushi Koma. I'm looking forward to that too.

I'm glad July 4th is over. I'll be really glad when people run out of fireworks so we don't have to listen to that noise and the girls won't be scared. What is it about firecrackers that is such a thrill? Do we all have to be a bunch of stupid rednecks like Duck Dynasty and Honey Boo-Boo? What has happened to pride in human potential? July 4th makes me think we've entirely dumbed ourselves down to big, fat, selfish, ignorant stubs. RAH-RAH USA. God bless Murrica. Oh but we're good Christians, see, we're waving our big fat red white and blue cross with stars and stripes on it.

It's my flag too. Don't hijack it with your religion. I don't share your fervor. Oh, by the way, when you try to get into heaven, you might think twice about waving that USA flag at the pearly gates. I don't think any divine being could be too happy with what the stars and stripes represents these days, the leaders of this country completely self-interested and tone-deaf to the needs of the people who reside there...

Last night there were a bunch of dweebs sitting out in the adjacent street setting off fireworks, sitting in lawn chairs right on the curb, with 4 adults drinking cans of beer and three little kids who were going out in the street to light them, and there were a couple of dogs too. I have never seen these people before, they were sitting next to a truck, I think they were visiting someone in the neighborhood. But I was walking by and I was creeped out first of all by the scene, but even more so by one of the creepy men leering at me as I walked by on the opposite side of the street.

First of all setting off fireworks in town is illegal. And it's a fire hazard, even though this year we've had more moisture, there's still dry grass everywhere. Of course no one pays attention to those common sense things, except for the people who have pets and are disturbed by the emotional response of their pets to the noise. These fireworks boneheads are likely the same people who think it's okay to open carry guns in restaurants and stores. No empathy for other human beings, or animals. I always wish they'd do us all a favor with their guns and shoot their own heads off by accident and win the Darwin Award.

I'm hoping I get to catch up on some sleep tonight with calm Buffaloes.

Make My Day: Pricks in Corvettes and Other Freaks of Nature

After last Friday's reality check with fatigue, I decided to make the week my easy week and just bag the rest of the weekend's workouts. So much for 100 miles, I'm not ready yet. That's okay.

I worked on things around the house and got some writing done instead. This week I'm sticking with 80ish miles and regular workouts, plus the Estes Park half marathon this Sunday.

Yesterday I had a decent 10 mile run where I pushed the pace a little, not too hard, but on the Power Trail hills. I felt strong. I spent the afternoon working, and for a couple of hours I was in the house listening to Iris bark herself hoarse while the repairman worked on the dishwasher. The heater died. The cost to fix it was half the cost of a new dishwasher. But it was easier to just get it fixed right now. Of course we have to wait a week for the part to come in. So I'll be doing more dishes...I hate doing dishes.

This morning I felt like going up to Horsetooth, but not for a long hill run, just a short one on the roads. I did a simple out and back from Rotary Park to the bottom the hill below Horsetooth Dam. It's 7.6 miles and I did it under 1:12. It has 1200 feet of vertical gain, and the same of descent.

It was a warm morning, and in one spot there was some road work where there were cones and it was a one lane stretch, so they had cars waiting to go by. The road workers flagged me by the first time, told me to just run the shoulder, I didn't have to stop. I felt fantastic on the run, I was averaging 11 minute pace on the hills, and if you saw these hills, 11 minute pace is damn good. I was between 7:30s and 8:30s on the downhill sections. I figured I'd do a short hill workout since the half marathon has it's share of hills this Sunday.

This afternoon when it gets warm I'll do more easy miles and get some heat training in.

This morning's hill run was pleasant most of the way. On the way back, as I was running the last big downhill off of Maniac, headed toward the road work site, a black Corvette passed me and I don't know much about muscle cars, but they can be used to make weird noises with the muffler or something.

These two guys were in the car and I was pushing pretty hard, in my own world, and as they drove by they made some kind of weird noise with the muffler. They weren't close enough to anything to be downshifting or putting on the brakes, it was pretty clear they did it to be assholes. It worked, it made me jump.

Whatever, they just proved that the size of their balls exceed the size of their brains. Assholes. I kept on going and about a half mile later I reached the construction zone. There was long line of cars waiting to pass, but I was on the shoulder and they flagged me by again. About a quarter of a mile later I was about to make the sharp left slightly uphill to go toward Dixon Dam and run up the last big hill to Rotary Park, and the cars were going by in a line. The corvette with the two pricks in it was one of the last cars, it was following the other cars, slowly.

When they finally had a clear stretch of road, just before the crest of the hill to Dixon Dam, they passed me again, and this time they really revved the engine. Boneheads. A few feet later, slamming on the brakes because of the sharp curves there at the dam. If they would have wrecked too f***ing bad, I wouldn't have gone diving into the reservoir to rescue them. Besides, my TNCC (trauma nursing certification) expired. Guess they'd just have to wait for their Darwin Award.

The other thing that I noticed on my run today, that I haven't seen too much of in this spot, is dumb drivers texting or reading their phone screens while driving up and around the curves on County Road 38E, from southwest Fort Collins up to Horsetooth Reservoir at the dam there. There are tons of bicyclists and runners on the shoulder every day in the summer.

These crazy idiot drivers are going around these curves not paying attention to the lines at the shoulder, and playing with their phones. Makes me want to smack their car with a stick or something, to wake them up. But there are no sticks. No trees. Maybe I should start throwing rocks.

So then on the way home, I was driving down Drake and at the stoplight at Taft Hill Road, this guy pulls up next to me in a red Corvette, he'd been going fast and had to slam on the brakes to stop. I thought, Not another prick in a Corvette! But it was true. There he was, in a bright red corvette with matching ear gauges. Big ones.

Have I mentioned how much ear gauges freak me out? I didn't even know what those things were, hadn't even noticed them, until a few months ago. Then it seemed like I saw them everywhere. I guess I didn't notice the small ones, if you're not looking closely they just look like earrings. But the big ones are hard to miss, without looking at least twice.

It's a college town. But lately it seems like I've been seeing more of them or I'm just more aware. I've also seen a lot of stretched earlobes. I would think these 20 something guys with the big floppy stretched out earlobes are going to be in for a rude awakening if in another few years they either go looking for a job, or they end up with a baby, who will be grabbing at those things and likely tear them out.

Just another way to keep plastic surgeons in business. I bet they'll be asking for insurance coverage for the cosmetic surgery to fix them, too. I wonder if infectious disease doctors have seen a lot of cases of cellulitis from those things getting infected. I bet they have.

I must be getting old.

Work Hangover Wednesday: WTF Winter?

We were supposed to get hit with the big spring blizzard of the year, the schools were called off the day before, everyone was canceling appointments and bracing themselves for the big dig-out.

When we woke up this morning I looked out the window and said to Dennis, "Better get your boots on, we'll be digging out for a couple of days."

It was barely even a dusting, but it was cold and windy as hell!

Two long days of work, with an unusually high proportion of crazies, Darwin Award candidates and just plain oddballs. It's not even a full moon, so I'm not sure what brought the creepy crawlers out.

All I know is that by the end of the day all I wanted to do was drink. My job has that effect on me sometimes. Not to mention that I've had very little sleep the past few nights.

I stopped off on my way home and got an Arrogant Bastard, and Dennis made catfish tacos with mango and pineapple salsa. Perfect. I didn't have to cook, all I had to do was relax.

Now I'm home for the rest of the week, with a gazillion things to get done and start packing for Ohio. I'm ready to get out of here, to get away from the daily onslaught of things turned upside down. How many times a day can you say, "you have got to be kidding me"? I'm due for a good rant, but I don't have the energy right now. Short, easy runs are all I'm allowed to do this week, so there could be some rants coming soon.

Whine Not...

It's COLD!

Where did this cold blast come from? It was getting so nice, and I was looking forward to March, and then we got this wimpy little snowstorm that hardly dropped any moisture on us, all it did was bring COLD air!

This week sort of sucked. I felt super tired after my early in the week runs. I was going to do 15 on Thursday but we had the snow that day and I don't have any excuse other than I wimped out. I know, it's pathetic. But I was tired, and sleep has been less restful this week. So instead of running on Thursday, I took care of personal business, got things like papers for doing our taxes organized, spent a little more time figuring out my upcoming trip to Cleveland/Columbus in April, and basically tried to have a lower stress day.

Then Friday I worked an 8 hour shift, and it started out as a great day. It was relaxed at work, I was busy but not running too much most of the time, had my favorite kind of patient, a first time chemo that goes all day, and all my other patients for the day were "easy". Our massage therapist was hanging around, giving patients massages, and had time to give each of the nurses a short little chair massage. A rare and perfect work day. Except.

My last "easy" patient of the day decided to have a reaction to her infusion, right at the same moment that my chemo patient was finishing up. Damn it. I hate that. I always want my first time chemo patients to have a smooth ride. And it was, except I wanted to be there through the whole thing, to the very end of the day. But that is the life of a nurse. It's always something...

When the "easy" patient went south, I asked one of my coworkers to finish up the chemo patient. As it turned out I didn't even get to say goodbye to the chemo patient because I was on the phone with the doctor. As it turned out the "easy" patient was okay, but when told me she thought her tongue was swelling that sort of threw everything off...

I made her wait while I paged the doctor, and while she waited and I watched her and checked her over thoroughly, I finally determined that her tongue was NOT swelling but not before she was questioning why she couldn't go home right away? Why did she have to wait there while I checked her vitals again, looked in her mouth, listened to her lungs and called the doctor?



Some people are just not all that bright. After I did all the charting on THAT incident, I got out of there. More like 9 hours.

Advice to everyone. If you tell the nurse your tongue is swelling, you're going to be detained. But you do have choices. If your tongue is swelling and you don't want to be detained, go ahead and don't say anything, leave the hospital and collapse out on the street in respiratory arrest. There is one advantage to the latter scenario, you might qualify for a Darwin Award. Nice way to be remembered.

It was a nice sunset and Dennis and I went out for sushi. But I did not run, and I had hoped to after work. I was too fried and tired when I got home, and it didn't seem worth it to deal with rush hour traffic for a little 5 mile run. I wimped out.


As a result I ended up with two days off running, and I had to get my speedwork in this week, since I missed it last week. Twenty-one degrees at the track, and that was when I finished up. It was 13 degrees when I woke up this morning. I did 12 x 400 meters, they were slower than I've been doing recently, but still respectable. I felt like I was freezing in between each one.

When I got home I whined about having to get 20 miles in for the day, and another 20 tomorrow. That is what my plan was. I was having a weak moment again and I tried to justify and rationalize and weasel out of it, I talked to Dennis about it and asked him what he thought, and he told me I was being a wimp.

If Dennis tells me I'm being a wimp, I'm being a wimp. He would tell me to rest if he thought I needed to rest. So I took Iris out for a couple more miles, and I am eating lunch and blogging and I might take a nap, but I will somehow have to get another nearly 10 miles in late today or this evening. Dennis won't let me get away with wimping out.

It is pathetic. All I have to do is get through this weekend and then I am tapering. Two more days of long miles. I've been doing it for 4 months, I can do it for two more days.

Tomorrow I will force myself out the door and go run at Horsetooth with the running club, that will keep me honest. After I get my 20 in tomorrow, it's taper time. I think I've earned it, as long as I finish my miles this week. Whine not.

The Pre-Apocalyptic Running for N.A.D.A.

Winter finally came to Fort Collins, just in time for spring. And the apocalypse.

I'll write a running blogpost tomorrow, if the world doesn't end. But if this happens to be my last blogpost, I'd rather rant. The NRA really pissed me off this week.

So if you're pro-assault weapon proliferation, might as well stop reading here right now because I'd hate to make you have a stroke right before the apocalypse.

Well, the week leading up to apocalypse has been a big disaster. I'm sort of thinking the Mayans were off a week in their predictions. Looked like the world might come to an end last Friday after all the shootings and crazy pornographic media drama that follows such tragedies. Why are we so addicted to these horrible events?

Call me cold-hearted and callous, but I think that this country is a candidate for the Darwin Awards, and this shooting, along with the many other recent mass shootings, is just evidence of that. We're doing ourselves in, out of our own failures. Except the problem is, we're doing in the most innocent and undeserving members of society, those little kids, and those teachers who protected them. Those people and their families and their community paid the price for our collective stupidity.

The lessons will be repeated until they are learned.

Who in the hell is out of their mind enough to think that assault weapons or the proliferation of guns is a good thing?

It blows me away (no pun intended) that after all this there are people out there calling for teachers to carry weapons in the schools, and calling for more guns, and blaming gun restrictions. What gun restrictions? We don't have any!

Yeah, yeah, I know, it's a conspiracy by President Obama, who is a Muslim, wasn't born here, and wants to take away our guns and we'll all be speaking Arabic.

Even some prominent conservatives have backed off on their staunch anti-gun control positions. But not the NRA, which as far as I'm concerned, deserves the Darwin Award. Those cowards couldn't even make a statement, they were there shitting their pants in the corner while their supporters ran away from them.

Sitting there in a puddle of their own excrement, spinning whatever response they're about to come out with tomorrow. The NRA had to wait a week before they could make a public statement? What the hell? After 5 days they finally said something, and the statement they released was vague. They'll make "meaningful contributions" to make sure this doesn't happen again? And that they are "shocked"? Now they say they'll release details (of what?) on Friday. I suppose they're waiting to see if the end of the world comes so they might be off the hook.

They are a terrorist organization as far as I'm concerned, they are crazy motherfuckers. They have no credibility in a rational, healthy, functioning world. I hope they surprise the hell out of me tomorrow by saying something that makes sense, but I'm not holding my breath. They might qualify for a NADA. Which is, Narrowly Averted Darwin Award.

But then, this country is obviously not running on rational, organized thought. And we're certainly not healthy, not in any sense of the word. So I guess we deserve what we get. The NRA trumps common sense. We let them have lots of power. Stupid is as stupid does.

And, by the way, Steve at Run. Race. Repeat. wrote an excellent blogpost about mental health this week, very thought-provoking.

There's No Place Like Home...

Today I took a trip to the Land of Oz.

I'm not sure if I was blown there by the 20+ mph winds all day long, with even stronger gusts, or if Oz is really just 50 miles away from Fort Collins and I ran there.



It was a tough day for a run, with strong winds the whole time, and I pushed myself hard to end up with a 10 hour, 12 minute, 56 second, 50 mile training run. Not bad for running on my own all day long, 15.4 laps around Houts Reservoir & Equalizer Lake in Loveland, and a few strange characters I met while following the yellow brick road, actually the half white concrete walking path, half mud which soon dried in the wind to dirt path.

But then, I happen to love running in the wind. There were whitecaps on the lakes and I figured out that grass grows horizontally in Oz.














And then there were the pelicans. A flock of white pelicans landed on the lake, surfing the waves. They must have thought their migration was over, and they found the ocean.





Pelicans must be the national bird in the Land of Oz. I also met some other creatures in Oz, not quite as graceful as the pelicans.

I met some Darwin Award candidates in Oz. On the south side of the lakes, there is another townhouse or condo being built next to the ones that are already there. I started running early this morning before anyone was at the construction site. After about 5 laps I heard the first catcall. I didn't think it was a catcall, I just heard something in the wind and turned my head toward the building. I saw two men on the roof, working, but obviously not working very hard.

I ignored them and ran on. After that, almost every time I ran by I heard some kind of whistle or comment, unless there happened to be a strong gust of wind howling at the same time. I could see them as I approached, standing on the steep boards of the roof with their nail gun. Up there on the roof, not paying attention to what they were doing, instead they were busy watching me run by. I bet their boss loves having employees like that.

I kept ignoring them, and thankfully they were gone for lunch for a lap which gave me a break. On the next lap I was getting irritated. After 10 loops of being ignored don't you think they'd get tired of the game?

I used some choice sign language in case they couldn't hear me in the wind, and yelled some choice words reflecting my impression of their intelligence. Then I resolved to ignore them the rest of the time. But I lucked out, on the next loop there was a man walking his dog by the same spot and that time the macho men held their tongues.

After that they seemed to be gone for the day.

This is the second time I've had to deal with this B.S. on the lakes loop. Last fall Cat and I were running out there one day, doing multiple loops. The apartment complex on the southeast corner of the lakes was under construction and some Darwin award candidates of the same mentality were up on the roof, yelling things at us.

Cat and I ended up changing our route to avoid that corner of the lake. But that pissed me off, why should we have to change where we run, it's a recreation path, and those bozos on the roof were interfering with our enjoyment of being out there.

So after we were done that day I took down the information on the project from a sign that was posted, and I called McWhinney, the developer, and asked to get in touch with the project manager. They took me seriously. I told the guy on the phone, they are making your business look bad and they are a liability, it's not only harassment but it's also a safety issue. What kind of crazy idiot would be up on a roof not paying attention to what they are doing and risk falling off the roof?

A Darwin Award candidate.

The company did follow up with it. After that there were no more catcalls, and the manager actually called me back later to tell me he had fired the ringleader.

There is no reason why women (or anyone) should be subjected to this kind of moronic behavior. It really blows me away that this kind of crap still goes on. Maybe I thought with my gray hair and middle age, I could pass a construction site unscathed. Apparently not. If you're female, you are still prey to the power games of this kind of unevolved, sick predator.

I really don't feel like pursuing that again, but if I was done early enough and had the energy I would have gone down there and raised some hell. By the end of the day the predators were gone and I was tired and wanted to get home to my Buffaloes.

At the end of my run, after 15 full loops, knowing all I had left was my extra little spur to make it an even 50, I clicked my heels together and said, "There's no place like home."

And before long I was magically transported back to Fort Collins, to the Buffaloes, who waited for me all day. I told them I would never leave home again. At least not until tomorrow morning for Rock Repeats with Katy.