Hedgehog: Putting Things In Perspective

We went to Como this past weekend.

It usually helps to go up there and get away from the routine and the rat race, to put things in perspective. I am very much over this hot weather. It's been hot for too long. The cooler temperatures felt so good.





Dennis is out of the boot, his foot is healed enough to go for some short hikes, so we took the girls on a short one and then just hung out at the cabin. Como rocks.

Still, I feel so unmotivated. I'm putting things into place, trying to fill the calendar with things that will help me get the lead out of my butt.

I picked out my next 5K, and it will be at sea level in LA. I got this crazy idea today when I couldn't motivate myself to run for the second day in a row, maybe I should do a week of walking. Sure, that will help the 5K time.

Signed up for my test date to take my oncology certification exam, so now I am committed. I have to study.

I have no reason to whine or snivel. I happen to know two healthy active people around my age who right now are recovering from pneumonia! One of them, a runner, was talking about how he has realized through these difficult times who his real friends are, the ones who have stuck with him despite his down time. Our conversation got me thinking about Hedgehogs.

Sometimes finding an old friend makes all the difference in the world. We lost the Hedgehog last year, it went missing despite an exhaustive search of the entire yard around the cabin last fall. But the Hedgehog turned up easily this weekend, even though he was nowhere to be found when we were here in June.

Sometimes we have to find ways to put things in perspective. When we're down and out, or just in a slump, it's important to find a silver lining. It can be an opportunity to sort through the baggage or trash from old relationships or friendships that aren't so great.

Not all old friends are as good as a long-lost Hedgehog, stinky and soggy from being left out in the rain for months or even a year. Hedgehogs just need a pass through the washing machine and they are as good as ever. Sometimes they still squeak after all they've been through.

On the other hand, or paw, there are times when we have to get rid of the toxic people from our lives, the ones who would drop you and forget about you, the ones who talk out both sides of their mouth, the ones who are so insecure with their own issues that they aren't worth the energy. Every time you're with them, it takes twice as much energy away from you just to interact with them and you leave their company wondering why you ever made the effort to get together with them in the first place?

Hedgehogs squeak, but they also listen. They don't jabber on and on and say mindless, trite things when you talk about something that's important to you. They don't claim to know how you feel, and they don't have to reply to every point you make with their own version of what they think is a similar experience.

Hedgehogs don't have codependency issues. They are content to listen and not try to fix things. They only squeak when they have something constructive to contribute, and they have a lot of empathy.

It's a good, healthy thing to do, every so often, to clean house when you realize there are things or people who drag you down. Keep the Hedgehogs, but let the energy suckers stay out in the rain.

There are times when you have to find new friends and at the same time nurture the most valuable old Hedgehogs instead of taking them for granted.

But sometimes all they need is a bath...